Restlessness

I attribute restlessness and rushing with outward influences. You worry about expectations, about time and about keeping up your reputation usually when either comes up. You look good with a list of accomplishments, right? Yes would be the common answer. Let me ask a follow up question. Does a list of accomplishments mean you are happy? Would it guarantee happiness? Doing something just to do it can feel so empty and purposeless. When you take action with intention with knowing your goals and targets; you probably will feel accomplished, and proud and joyful too.

This is the battle with restlessness. It takes time to decide what you would like your target(s)/goal(s) and intentions to be. Be kind enough to give yourself that time. When you feel the urge to charge in and take action; you probably should step back and ask yourself why do I want to do this now and how does it serve me in this moment?

We all have seen the signs of restlessness like when you second guess yourself, when you rush a project/goal, when the uncertainty is extremely uncomfortable, when your mind is running 100 miles per hour. A lot of times, this is happening because you are not connecting with yourself and your true thoughts but taking only into consideration the opinions and feedback of others. . Look to the body in these matters. The body provides clues to our emotional centers. I believe physical ailments are emotional indicators. A cold usually invades someone who is feeling overwhelmed and probably should slow down and ask for help.

When you are in a restless state you might be having a hard time getting focused and/or having a challenge with quieting your mind. When trying to meet a deadline and tackling a long to do list, take it one step at a time. Trying to take on all the items at once will not work.

What grounds you? What can you do to eliminate distractions? How can you raise your awareness when you need to step out of the restless state? What allows you to listen to your true self?

I believe restlessness withers away the more you step into yourself fully. This is what a holistic approach to leadership is all about. In my journey, this has meant accepting all of who I am, even the parts I want to reject and deny. When there is a level of acceptance, you know the areas you want to work on. Being honest about your strengths and weaknesses can help you navigate the choices you make in your life. This level of awareness allows you to transform positively and move closer to who you can truly be.

In Spirit Living

To be inspired, in spirit, connected to your true essence, motivated; gives me the strength to push forward, enjoy life and continue my seeker quest. I actively look for inspiration. Looking for it everywhere, brings me to find it at every turn. When you expect to receive, you are open to receiving.

It’s like when out-of-towners come for a visit and you rediscover the place you live in. I notice something new from their vantage point. Just like you learn something new with each new day. If you are open to new information, it will come to you. It brings out the value of gratitude. It also helps to avoid taking things, people and places for granted.

What are the natural connections that you make everyday effortlessly? I can get inspired by almost anything: a book I am reading, a quote I see, a surprise email, a movie, song, listening to the wind holler, admiring the way the sun reflects in the river. I can go on and on easily about the simpler things in life that bring me joy.

As you connect more with the essence of your being, I believe it becomes easier to remain open to inspiration. You recognize and value the essentials of life and being. Only you can decide your values and what your priorities are in this moment. Try it out for a couple of weeks; to actively seek out simpler things that bring you joy and observe yourself. Learning to live our best lives is a daily process.

All of these components help you ASPIRE to live your dreams. In order to do so, you must look within yourself and seeking out inspiration can connect you with your spirit. Once you are connected and you aspire; then a vision comes together for you and you can move toward it through goals and planning. Once the cycle sets in, you must remember to review and update your values and priorities after you reach a goal.

Inspiration reminds us why we are here. This reminder is so important as we get caught up in the doing part as opposed to the being part of ourselves. Spirit living; actively looking for inspiration will keep bringing you back to focus on your values and what is important to you. In turn you will move closer and closer to the vision you have for yourself. Do you see it? Do you dream it? Dream on.

Spirit Lift

Fall is here and winter is on the way. We need to maintain that bright sun that we get in the summer in our hearts for the other seasons that follow.

We all have days where we feel like blah! How do you make that shift and lift your spirit? Why don’t we speak more often of the inner fitness battles we all face? We constantly have to work on matching our outsides with our insides and vice versa. When you feel good, you do good and attract more good into your life and being.

Here are seven ways you can boost your spirit
• Affirmations; these positive statements can help you fake it until you make it. Say them out loud, in front of a mirror and as many times as you need.
• Physical activity; go to the gym, do yoga, go for a run, play sports, physical outlets can release negative energy and thoughts. If you can’t fit this in, go for a stroll around your neighborhood and/or on the way home. Being in nature helps too.
• Meditation; Give your mind a break and take 20 minutes in stillness, even if you find it in a bathroom stall.
• Music; put on your favorite song and rock out! Music can be so inspirational and get you moving.
• Laughing and smiling changes my mood easily. Watching a comedy and/or just faking a smile until you feel it, helps. Having a great conversation with a friend that has me all smiles and laughs is great too.
• Be of service; volunteer and take the focus off of you for a change. Help uplift someone else’s day.
• Be in Gratitude; Having a good attitude and thinking good thoughts can influence your mood for the better. Remind yourself what you are grateful for. Go through photos, journals and memories of good times.

It is one thing to be in spirit and it is another to acknowledge and know when your spirit needs lifting. Being in spirit is what we all should be striving for; inspiration. The challenge is in reaching out and taking the first steps back toward yourself. Instead of isolating yourself because you are not up for company, challenge yourself to reach out. Ask for affirmations from a friend/family member you know you can trust and open up to. Sometimes above all these spirit lifters mentioned, we need to get things off of our chest. Be courageous and do the best thing for yourself.

How do you lift up your spirit? I bet you do it easily for someone else. Just remember that the times we would like to shut down and isolate ourselves, are the times when we need to actually reach out to others. Look for inspiration and strive to be inspired, this keeps my spirit lifted.

Time to regroup

It’s autumn again, today we have equal parts of light during the day as we do of darkness over night. This force upon us invites us to reflect and regroup. How would you like to end this calendar year? What new goals are there to set? If you follow this blog, you know I always speak of performing belief reviews. Updating your values, and beliefs, keeps you connected to who you are. Detox your beliefs and release those that no longer serve you. Now is a great time.

All transitions are opportunities. In the book Life Code, Dr Phil ask three questions in a moment like this, What works? What do I need to stop doing? What do I need to start doing? Let’s celebrate this shift with going with the flow of renewal.

Exciting things are already happening. The People’s Climate March took place just days ago. It is a beautiful statement of the world coming together in honor of Mother Earth. Hundreds of thousands of people from all over the world gathered together in New York City to pay respect to, stand up for, honor and speak of the importance of how we should take care of Mother Earth. Our connection to Mother Earth is easily displayed through seasonal changes like this one. Our transition to fall influences our thoughts, actions and patterns.

The leaves and colors of the season make it easy to reflect and regroup. As a people, perhaps we are trying to reflect and regroup with our plans to keep Mother Earth vibrant and well taken care of. Reflecting is about looking back to what we have learned and gaining some clarity around how to move forward. Knowing your focus/intention is very important. Once you have set that goal then you can “leave the details to the Universe” Deepkah Chopra.

I am looking forward to reflecting and taking this time to gather information. Look for the moments where you can be still with yourself. I have learned how to truly enjoy a cup of my favorite chai tea. I let thoughts slowly move and see where my mind needs to be. I ask myself questions and the answers show up. This season I will seek the still moments and live by the words of Brene Brown, “What we know matters, who we are matters more.”

What is empowerment?

“As we let our light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence actually liberates others.” Marianne Williamson

In some regard, I have always seen empowerment as leading from behind, giving others the space to grow and learn. It’s been my teaching strategy to give students of all ages, information, tools and options for them to make informed decisions. For me, power sharing and collaborating are natural demonstrations of empowerment.

What empowerment is NOT
It is not just delegating to prove to yourself that delegating can get done. Some take on too much and are forced to turn over and give up control. Some feel stuck and know forward movement needs to happen. Healthy delegation is when you match assignments to persons skilled in the corresponding area. I value team membership for this reason. You do not feel alone and nor do you have to work alone if you are surrounded by active team members.

Talking at people is neither a source of empowerment. Kids do what you do, not so much what you say and tell them to do. Like the well known proverb, “Action speaks louder than words.” It is what I believe the difference between management and leadership to be. Management is about making the best decisions to move teams and projects forward. Leadership is about demonstrating action and role modeling duties and behaviors that benefit teams and projects.

POWER
Let’s talk about the power in empower. How do you build your power, build your voice and your confidence? How do you lift others up to do the same? Most definitions of empowerment include giving power to someone else and/or authorizing power to others. I think it is about power with as opposed to having power over. How do you use your power for good and for the good of others?

A great example of empowerment is activity and creating spaces like Proud to be a Latina’s EmPower Hour. A topic based discussion lead by experts to share information and allow for questions and answer. Empowerment allows for gathering information in intentional spaces to inspire, inform and gather community.

My definition of empowerment changes all the time. Right now, I envision an empowered person as someone who is confident, connected to their purpose and a proactive leader. Continue the dialogue and check out the new book, the Empowered Woman: Purpose, Passion & Possibilities now available on amazon.com.

Simple living's best

For some, simple living is about living without many possessions and being a minimalist. I believe it is about living intentionally and with integrity. Essentially, simple living for me is about living your best life. It is about keeping the distractions to a minimum and keeping the things of quality and of happy living in your life. The best model and example of simple living has been the book and principals of the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. I use them as ground rules for groups, and encourage you to use them in all ways you can. Let’s take a look at these four simple principals:

Be impeccable with your word: For me, this is about making commitments to myself that I need to complete. After you learn how to follow through with promises to yourself, you surely can easily keep your word to others. Our words represent us and what we stand for. In living simply, you set realistic goals and achieve them; you live in your purpose and joy.

The other important part about being impeccable with your word is the fact that words have energy. What is the intention behind the words that you use and when you use them? Like the ancient golden rule goes, “Do unto others, as you would like done unto you.”

Don’t make assumptions: I like to ask clarifying questions to be thorough and to avoid any misunderstandings. It is important to learn and know what you need and want. Others can not read your mind nor do they want to sometimes. Everyone understands situations and conversations differently as we are all unique individuals. The more questions you ask, the more likely some common understanding will be established. Why guess what people are thinking, when we can simply ask.

Don’t take things personally: This reminds me to focus on the bigger picture and that life goes beyond just me. I have avoided so much pain and suffering from living this principal day to day. I have come to understand when others criticize me and try to put their actions on me, that in fact it is about their experience and how they see themselves in the world. We are responsible for ourselves, not anyone else.

Do your best: Knowing that I tried whether I succeed or failed, makes all the difference. Your best will look different under changing circumstances. You do better when you’re well and emotionally level. If you know who you are, you know when you are doing your best and when you can give more. In living simply, doing your best not only yields better results, it makes you feel good.

Surrender and maintain standards

“Our source of suffering is always related to our resistance to what is. The soul doesn’t try to control life; the ego does. When your ego is wrapped firmly around a desire, your peace of mind and happiness are held hostage by an obsessive need to control the outcome. After enough pain and suffering, you’ll eventually get the message: If you don’t learn to surrender your will, you will surrender your peace.”- Cheryl Richardson

I believe in developing and maintaining standards. I also believe in surrendering. Our attachment to expectations causes so much suffering and frustration. I offer surrendering or at the very least allow your expectations to change as you continue to engage with purpose and all of who you are.

The real difficulty is letting go of unrealistic expectations. Let’s surrender to what is as opposed to drawing attachment to these thoughts. Like self-love and self-discipline, standards are something that have to be established independently, unlike expectations that can be imposed from a variety of sources including culture and your up bringing. Standards grow out of your values and how you see and carry yourself. Standards are established and then others know how to treat you.

Standards remind me of the flight policy of putting your mask on yourself before you help others. At some point, we have to let go of other people’s expectations. The well wishes and good expectations others put on us should be just that well wishes. Taking the expectations on are another story. They may limit us and go against what comes natural to us. Like the sticker my mom had hanging on our door while I was growing up read, “Vive tu vida, no la mia.” (Live your life, not mine).

It’s up to all of us to manage expectations and maintain the standards we need in our lives. Surrendering to what is, allows us to let go and move from the present. Start by practicing non attachment to expectations, especially the expectations that are put upon us. As Alan Watts expresses eloquently, “Waking up to who you are requires letting go of who you imagine yourself to be.” I believe this opens us up to even more than what we have dreamed up for ourselves.