the Emotional Intellect

Emotional intelligence and emotional literacy is about feeling your feelings in the best way you can and in a safe and productive way. Emotions move us and influence our state of being. How come we barely talk about this? It is probably because we still are figuring out how to talk about this. Yes, we should talk about feelings more.

Daniel Coleman introduced the concept of emotional intelligence in the mid 90s with a book by the same name. Some would define emotional intelligence as a set of skills that help to identify, appropriately express and manage their emotions; develop effective relationships; cope with stress; adapt to change; and make good decisions. It differs from common sense. Emotional intelligence helps me to practice what I preach. It allows me to be an observer of myself and do my best. I believe this is what it takes to practice emotional intelligence, being an observer. It is about getting to know more about who you are and what your needs are from moment to moment.

I cannot stress enough the importance of emotional intelligence. It is the foundation for self awareness which leads to confidence, effective coping skills, deeper relationships, better decision making and overall success in community building and achieving one's goals. We have work to do in terms of changing the perception of emotions. It is about learning how to embrace emotions and feeling the feelings. We have been taught to suppress emotions, particularly boys in our society have been taught this from a young age. What have we seen this result in?, for some in explosions of anger from deep inside. Anger can be put to good use if you learn how to do so.

Emotional literacy (intelligence) is the entry point to empathy and compassion. If we raise the value of such intelligence, the world can be a better place. It is also the entry point to building wisdom and mastering ourselves. There is no end point and these skills certainly allow the journey to be more enjoyable for everyone. As a life coach, my role is to help people develop the observer in them. Your observer will enable you to get to know your needs as opposed to your wants in the moment. Let me be clear I am NOT talking about the desire to want other people to feel your feelings. I am talking about the courage to sit with your feelings yourself. My beautiful people, once again, let's talk about the feelings!